When I was young I was diagnosed with “profound unilateral hearing loss”, which sounds like something you get from thinking too deeply. In fact, it means I am completely deaf in my right ear. As a teenager there were some nights where being half-deaf felt like a superpower. In bed I could roll over onto my working ear and blot out noise completely. Another perk is a game I call “friend-shui”. When I go to dinner, I position my friends around my “good ear”. If I’d like to talk to somebody, I make sure that they sit next to me, while those who have annoyed me are shooed to the end of the table.