The one and only Stella Young

Caitilin Punshon
Summary 
Stella Young has died at the age of 32. She was a much loved writer, commentator, comedian and disability activist. Her words caused people to think and ask questions. They were funny but also wise. She gave an influential TEDx talk and was editor of the ABC’s Ramp Up website. She wrote many memorable articles including two letters to herself. Stella was a passionate advocate for a lot of important causes. She achieved a great deal and will be sadly missed.
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Caitilin Punshon on 16/12/2014
Her words compelled us to challenge our attitudes.
Her words compelled us to challenge our attitudes.

Her words compelled us to challenge our attitudes.

Once you had seen it, you could never forget her smile. Nor the sound of her laugh, if ever you heard it. Chances are that you would have. She laughed often and made us laugh too. You would expect that from a comedian. But of course, Stella Young was more than that. She was remarkably more. Sadly, she died on 6 December at the age of 32.

A communicator and teacher


Stella was greatly loved and admired by many in the disability community and beyond. She was an exceptionally skilled communicator. Her words, whether written or spoken, were direct and influential. They were usually pretty funny too, as her infamous TEDx talk shows. Other especially memorable examples of her talent can be found in two letters she wrote to herself. One was addressed to 16 year old Stella. The other was to her 80 year old self. These letters resonate with Stella’s wry wit. They also showcase her warmth and her wisdom.

She once said that said she “desperately wanted to be a teacher”. However, she never gained ongoing employment in a school classroom. Nor did she get to host Play School, despite her wish to do so. But of course that didn’t stop her. Why would it? In so many ways and in an impressive range of places, Stella was a teacher. She was a good one too.

The ideas and issues she raised as editor of Ramp Up and elsewhere could be seen as either provocative or obvious. It depends on how you move through the world. You may not have agreed with everything she said. But it’s unlikely she would have wanted you to anyway. Rather, Stella delighted in nudging people to think and to question. Her words compelled us to challenge our attitudes towards ourselves and others. It’s a rare skill and she used it well.

Passionate advocacy


Stella’s personal belief was that “disability comes with as much privilege as it does disadvantage”. She confronted prejudice with grace. But when necessary, she also fought it with wit and fire. She was a vibrant disability activist but her advocacy went much further. Indeed, it’s hard to imagine an injustice or inequality that Stella wasn’t willing to oppose.

She cared deeply about gay rights and women’s safety, among many other issues. Her family have asked people to consider making a donation to Domestic Violence Victoria in her honour. Their statement notes this is “one of the causes Stella felt intensely passionate about”.

Strong, stroppy and luminous


Hundreds of heartfelt tributes have been made to Stella since her death. Friends, colleagues and politicians have all shared their shock and sadness, as well as their respect for this wonderful woman. Commentator Helen Razer described her friend as a “luminous bruiser”. This striking image aptly captures both Stella’s light and her fight. In her own words, she was “a proper kind of stroppy person” who wanted to be remembered as “a strong, fierce, flawed adult woman”.

It is alarmingly easy to praise Stella for being extraordinary. She achieved a great deal in her life and did so in her own, sparkling style. A lot of us are better off today as a result of her efforts. And countless people now think differently about disability because of her. We can – and should – give thanks for that.

To many, however, to her family and friends, she was just Stella. Not a superhero. Not a saint. Simply Stella. The one and only.

She will be missed.

Stella Young TedXtalk

A letter to my younger self

A letter to her 80-year old self

 

Readers comments (6)

Very sad to hear of her death. I often visited her website, RampUp. I did not agree with everything she said, as some of my comments on that site reveal. But I loved her inspirational porn speech. Her death is a great loss to the disability community.

Stella will live on in our thoughts and your words. She was truly a very important part of our community.

Extremely well written, Caitlin!

A lovely tribute to a woman who knew how to get under our skin; she made us laugh, she made us think. She will be sorely missed.

Thank you Graham, Annette, Deanne and Jodie for your comments on this article. I am sure Stella will be remembered and honoured in a fitting (and possibly polka dotted) way.

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